Online Banking, a One Act Play

Me: [Trying to do online banking]

Citibank: We need to verify that you are you.

Me: OK, here is my phone number

Citibank: …

Me: OK, that isn’t working, here is another phone number

Citibank: here is your code ****

Me: [enter code]

Citibank: that isn’t correct, you are locked out

Me: Please unlock me and send me a text message instead of voice prompt

Citibank: OK

Me: Nothing has changed

Citibank: OK

Me: Nothing has changed

Citibank: Let me put you through to technical support

Me: [on hold]

Me: [on hold]

Me: [on hold]

Me: [on hold]

Citibank: [hangs up]

Me: Put me through to technical support immediately

Citibank: OK

Me: No, I need technical support

Citibank Tech Support (CTS): Everything is OK

Me: No it isn’t

CTS: Yes it is

Me: No it isn’t

CTS: Maybe it just takes time for the front end to reflect the changes

Me: OK, but even then I am getting the wrong verification numbers

CTS: Oh, that is a known problem, just keep trying

Me: I can’t, it locks me out of the system

CTS: We are working on it

Me: [silent scream]

CTS: Thank you. It’s been a pleasure.

Me: …


Note1: This is the short version. This actually took 5 phone calls over two days and a total of several hours.

Note2: I don’t understand why I can’t just use something like the Google Authenticator App or even do 2FA via the Citibank mobile app.

Note3: I was able to set this up fine with other banks, it seems to be a unique problem for Citibank

Note 4: 2008 The U.S. rescued Citigroup Inc, agreeing to shoulder most losses on about $306 billion of the bank’s risky assets”